03 August 2008
It was almost exactly two years ago. Man, it seems like so much longer than that. That was when I met my Goddess, my dream girl, the one I'll always want, but can never have - Eva. But, wait, some background first.
I was about four months out of a really tough relationship. Don't get me wrong, I loved Jill, passionately. Loved her more than anyone before and probably since. Loved her so much that I lost all sense of myself. It was a disaster from the start.
I had been planning a trip abroad, my first ever, for a little while. First it was to be Belize, but when that fell through I set my sights on Peru. I pulled together the money, with a little help from my family, and in the middle of August I was off.
The plane flew all night and into the morning. I don't remember whether or not I slept - probably a little bit - but in any case I was tired when I arrived. When I got to the hostel in Lima where I would spend the first night it was only about 10 AM - I breakfasted on a hamburger bought at a small stand on the way and then went upstairs to my room and passed out.
I can't remember how long I was actually asleep, but it couldn't have been too much time because I still had the whole day ahead of me. I grabbed a book, and rather than sitting alone in my room, I went down to the living room and read on the couch.
That was the first time I saw her. I looked up from my book over to the computer. She turned and looked at me and I was caught by the two bright sapphires the glowed beneath her ebony hair. I tried to go back to reading my book, but could not resist looking back up at her only to see her looking back at me. She actually noticed me, saw me, and seemed to want me to come to her. However, being too shy, I let her go. Eventually, she drifted back up the stairs and disappeared into one of the rooms.
Shortly after she came back down with a friend of hers. I was on my way up, but she stopped me. SHE approached ME! She said they were going to go to the beach, would I like to come along? Sure, I said. I ran upstairs, put my book away and went back down to her, shocked that she would even recognize my existence.
On the walk to the beach we all talked, the three of us. There was a bit of a language barrier. I learned that Eva was a French Basque - she spoke French, of course and fluent Spanish, but was embarrassed by the little English she knew. I spoke only a very small amount of Spanish, and so we spent most of the time talking to and through the other girl who spoke fluent English, Spanish, French and German. I didn't care, though. When we got to the beach Eva shared her towel with me. She read for a little while and then we talked. I told her that I was studying anthropology and she told me about her fascination with ancient relics, and museums. The more we talked the more I felt her come down to my level - she was just a woman, a beautiful woman, but someone I could talk to, someone I could see myself spending time with, someone who would care about me. The three of us spent the rest of the evening walking around Lima and then returned to the hostel and watched Harry Potter in French with English subtitles.
The next day I had to leave, to go to Huancayo where I would spend the next month teaching young children and living with a Peruvian family. I saw her one last time before I left. I was on the computer checking my email, she was leaving to go to the museum in Lima. She said goodbye, wished me well on my trip and kissed my cheek. I kissed her cheek, a standard salutation in Latin America and Europe, but in that moment it was ecstasy for me - to feel her soft skin on my lips.
I never saw her again. I have no way of contacting her, no way of knowing what ever happened to her. She was in my life for an instant - washed all trace of Jill from my mind, like one of those magical cleaners you see on TV that get out any stain - and then she was gone. But I'll always remember her, for her beauty, for her humanness, and for showing me that life does go on. I can never have her, but she will always be mine.
Posted by Jeremy Trombley at 8:16 PM